There are many dodgy characters that aren Narcissistic or Autistic and the stigma attached is unacceptable. Some of the seeing form opinions, that the Blind guy is just being obstinate or purposely manipulative, because he knows more about the statue than the rest of the room, and pretends to not be able to describe the image or colour. I had to tell him 3 different occasions the same thing before he realized what I said and was surprised. It is helpful to be flexible and adaptable. According to the film The Magic Pill, even eliminating carbohydrates can markedly reduce the symptoms of autism! He keeps demanding support, care, listening, which is reasonable, but I get very little. I had a terrible time, her anger and contempt directed at me, humiliating and really scary for me. While I absolutely LOVE being right and will happily crow about it when I am, I am actually more interested in finding THE TRUTH than in being right and I can readily admit to being wrong or making a mistake. Were taking time apart now as he thinks were not compatible because I didnt show enough interest in some historical place we were at and I lectured for an hour (was really about 15) about a subject I liked while at another historical place and he feels the list has gotten too long.. Should I chalk it up or try to understand this affectionate but one sided man? Lol how can society be prosper and happy when it is lead by monsters that work on self-destruction? Another suggestion, find your running boots before he drags you down and makes you believe you are all the things that are going wrong in his life. I couldnt behave properly for a woman and even less children. While I fret over finding best power deals, house insurance etc, he doesnt even notice and sits on his x box!! All my efforts to improve my situation.. bring.. results.. finally! As if you were a spectator, and watch the things other people do. The difference between these women is really easy to spot. Your partner will probably not be able to do the things that are important to youat least not in a satisfying manner. Thank you James, I appreciated reading about your rather unpleasant experiences, but feel uplifted by your courage, determination and perseverance to get yourself into good and positive emotional and mental awareness . I read the 2 columns.. autism vs narc. I have a narcisstic Mother who thinks she has Asbergers. Everything at the right time to make me fail all i try to achieve and dig dig always with that massive guilt moutain they keep building to push me to suicide. I now know to be specific with the times if we are going out and not change them suddenly. He is only playing with you. Educate yourself on both afflictions, I found my final answer on a site called First Wives World if I may add this here, it was like a weight lifted from my shoulders after reading the piece of information where someone else had suffered under a narcissist. Narcissistic rage is an outburst of intense anger or silence that can happen to someone with narcissistic personality disorder. I have set myself boundarys as far as her stepping into my personal life, and I am the one who has to step her back if she over reaches, because she just feels she is trying to sort it. Someone, like a narcissist/psychopath/sociopath couldnt give a toss about pets and animals unless it benefitted them socially. 1- they had food, 2- i had asked that therapist to be registered to food bank in case for months she knew.. so no she was not bringing me anywhere. I keep reading that we dont recover but I i imagine there has to be something that works, both for me and people that encounter me. 8. Look to any anthropology. The narcissist harms other people because they are harmed themselves. I am very grateful he is in my life. Narcissists have a way of getting you back, its called guilt. But I do believe my father thinks completely different to other people. My moms husbands seems to have both Aspergers and covert narcissism. For many of us that is something we can only dream of. And then on the flip side again, he definitely sits on the pity pot and blames others. I read your piece about your life and trouble with interest. Thank you for all the advice. The only other thing in science is something more of the soul more than psychiatry which I feel someone should point out, as with the so called DSM is absolutely NOT science so it is at best irrelevant to mention this offensive publication. Only when I moved out from the shared house did I lose my fear of her. He is a truly great person to me just not to others. They all believed that i had a magical power like a jedi and that for me everything in life was easy and that if i didnt achieve anything so far it wasnt because of theeir help or because of all my life struggle, nope i was just LAZY. If you go as psy you must want to help, make people feel better.. not destroy them or make them worst. From what you have said I can see a certain amount of manipulation going on. Break up and never look back. having anxiety about going to school. I do not accept any kind of social heirarchies to me everyone is just a human being. This works out well because Narcissistic people dont take responibilty or blame for any of their own behaviour and having a condition to blame works for both of us. We are seeing a trend with people, mostly men who come from families of both NPD on one side and ASD on the other side of the family. people with autism are not identical in their behavior. Our marriage ended after 25 years and was through my choice in asking him to leave. If it werent that hes antisocial and gives me the silent treatment through the week in his office, I couldnt survive, since we are both largely at home. Yes these two afflictions are both on the autism spectrum, but are somewhat different. Even if i am myself very smart allowing to study on my own and discover things others couldnt etc. I developped a 6th sense for dealing with narcs. I have included a link if I may that may help with some understanding of the situation. The difference is that while all people with Aspergers are narcissistic (not NPD, but self-centered; it's a central trait), all people with Narcissistic Personality Disorder are definitely not aspergers, and can be the total opposite: super smooth and charming. When he has a rage its off the scale! You can ask him to leave if you have the courage, as maybe living separately will give you both more freedom to run your own lives independently, especially financially. My therapists/psy can repeat me non-stop that its normal in my condition. I hope Ive explained it so you can understand what I am trying to say. So good luck to anyone whos in the same situation as myself. Im not a therapist and dont profess to be one. Any assistance with this will be highly appreciated and therapeutic for me. I suspect that will be a harder mystery to unpick. Life is much better now, I know not to expect her to do things straightaway, but to work up to them. Mary Hinge. I never solved it, it just wasnt there any more. The preceding article was solely written by the author named above. The treatment then was medication and psychiatric ward. But anyway if anyone has any ideas id like to hear it. I see my psychiatrist regularly. Though there are parts that are widely understood by the public the majority of a narcissism diagnosis is not. I am very smart and could rebuild my life maybe im still 38 yo so i could. Break up and never look back. He has almost savant like abilities with facts, dates, details and questions if others really know what theyre talking if they cant relate their knowledge as well as he does. I just wish I could manage better. Goodness me!!! I have also been a little different, not to his degree but do know how difficult growing up and living like that can be. functional) neurologist or neuroscientist It was very difficult growing up with an older sibling who was very manipulative and all about self. They would constantly say im evil and i ruin everyones life and i believed them but the facts were not adding up. I wonder do you feel that the more he tells you it is not working the more you want to help him because you feel he has a problem you may be able to help with? I feel Im disabled in some way and technology isnt where I ought to be investing my time and my gifts. less interest in sports or activities that involve coordination. I have had a difficult life, one near nervous breakdown in my early 20s, averted at the last minute when I came across a book by J.Krishnamurti and this writer and speaker and philosopher has helped me all my life, the insight I had back then stayed with me, without that I would not be here writing this. It is unlikely, for an individual to be both autistic and narcissistic. Even if i had multiple therapies, therapists, psychiatrists. . He then insists I look at them several times a day, tells me hates them, and he cant cope with how upset they make him. All these children DO NOT exhibit full blown narcissism as my ex partner did. She was always the ultimate giver and forgiver. The man spoke to the doctor about the world he sees out there as being like chaos and how he needs order in his life. I had asked to be split per months.. or saved.. nothing.. except split in 2x5k and second 5k required my mother approval.. ok. 1 month and a half later i lost all im suicidal but i hide it. Narcissism or Asperger's? How to Tell the Difference I liked him a lot and have a lot of experience regarding mental illness due to growing up with a parents affliction, but this I hadnt encountered. Interesting question for sure. I felt I had accurately diagnosed him as an Aspie many moons ago, wirh no empathy and it did feel better when I realised it was not all my fault. Learn how they behave, think ahead of time to protect myself from future attacks to my safety etc. Narcs are all about the power and putting poeple in their place i.e. Now, Im older than him and odds are he will be left with the house, but it annoys me he puts nothing into it. With Asperger's and NPD, a lot of the criteria overlap. Their social competence usually exceeds their other abilities, but from their perspective they have no such limits. Im also affectionate and have no problem calling him sweetheart or hon etc but the only term of endearment he has for me after one year is Missy saying hes just not like that even though he calls his daughter sweetheart all the time. I also read an interesting piece of information recently and use this thought when I feel my mind is letting me down. He responded that since I just couldnt wait until he was better to hear from him, and since we had no interests in common, that some time apart would give us perspective. And before that beeing erronously diagnosed having Schizophrenia simplex. I just came to the understanding that narcissism is a spectrum, and that my mother might be on it. I didnt even read any further than those points I mentioned. Frederic, please try to encourage happiness, in yourself, and any person who understands you. So I told him I reccently did an Autism quiz and it came back saying I was very high on the autistic side of the spectrum and should get assessed. Aspergers AND Narcissism? : r/aspergers - Reddit Narcs if only they could self-destroy each other instead of trying to beat the few good people that are left in this world haa :(. Take charge of your own life. He makes the bed every day and sweeps the floor, and asking more than that is too much. Observe the persons behavior, dont absorb it. To my mind this is what life and love is but it can also be debilitating to tender souls. But hes manipulative & very Nasty, when we have words and always blames me for everything within the conversation , if I make a comment he takes it a derogatory comment towards him & after 25yrs Ive learnt how to word my comments, as I know he doesnt take the blame he has the ability to make you believe everything that said is my fault ( he was like that with his 1st wife ) but cannot see it . I have a 32 year old daughter who still lives with me and has high functioning autism, her personality is nothing like his was. 5. If I say something about myself or my family, he hijacks the conversation and makes it about him or his family. Develop healthy, happy connections within other relationships. I knew who the abuser was in all three cases. He seemed on edge when he got home from work. He will pick up every small thing around the house I do, particularly when he gets stressed. Is it common for people to be a narcissist and be Autistic? I feel sorry for people reading this trying to get help for their narcissism. For example, many people with high-functioning autism are capable of manipulation, guilt-tripping, and not allowing you to say no.
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